Breaking News: Squirrel Cries Foul


NASHVILLE, TN. Mr. P. Nut Squirrel, Presidential Candidate for the Rodent Party in the Back Yard’s presidential campaign released an attack on Jack the Scottie early today. 

Mr. Squirrel argued that Jack the Scottie was unduly influencing the polls in the neighborhood. Just yesterday, Jack the Scottie and Arya the Porch Dog took a tour of neighborhood polls, finding that Jack’s campaign was surging ahead of Squirrel’s numbers. 

A photo of Jack marking one of the polls was obtained by the Rodent Party from the Puppyrazzi. “Sure, he’s surging in the polls! Look what he’s doing to them! It’s totally disgraceful! I say that Jack’s poll ‘influencing’ has got to stop!”

“Squirrel polls show that I’m on top of the race,” pointed out Mr. Squirrel. (Squirrel polls involved a complicated analysis of nut stashes, a process barely understood by this reporter.)

The campaign had entered a time of civility several weeks ago. Signs point to the end of the detente.

9 Responses

  1. hoomans can not campaign within 100 feet (or is it 300, my memory fails this morning) of a polling place. Come election day will Jack have marked his presence in a way that does give rise to charges of election irregularities and campaigning within that zone? Perhaps his campaign aides have not kept a short enough leash on him. Should we wish for heavy rains to wash away the evidence of his visit and restore for all a fresh start?

  2. Deborah Maria

    Methinks the rules may be different in the four-legged race for primacy of the back yard.

    Jack is making his mark in the inimitable way of his species. I’ll bet Mr. P. Nut is doing similar. Let’s see what else the Puppyrazzi uncovers in the next 9 days!

    Civility. What a concept……..

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